Hallelujah, Anyway!

"Oh my road, oh my road ain't hallelujah, but... Hallelujah anyway!"

This line is from one of Kevin and I's favorite songs, Oh My Road sung by our favorite band Grizzly Goat (check out the song and the band at their website http://grizzlygoatmusic.com/listen/ ).

And to be honest, HALLELUJAH, ANYWAY! has become our motto these past two months.

A run of bad luck hit us from late April through early June--job loss, a myriad of health issues on both our parts, and getting kicked out of our apartment, to name the biggest challenges--and with each new smattering of bad news, we put dreams on shelves. We keep kicking. We're taking time to make sense of our rearranged future.

When baloney like this hit us, I was--firstly--angry. There are plenty of places and people on whom to lay the blame, but anger--well, big surprise, it didn't help. My wise and patient husband Kevin helped take me to my knees to ask for God's help to see the big picture. To be honest, the last thing I wanted to do was say "hallelujah!" because wait a second, we're good kids, right? We've done all we can do to be charitable, industrious, honest... so why do the storm clouds come?

We don't have all the big picture yet, but I have felt peace. And best of all my heart and mind, blinded previous, was cleared enough to at least see all the good in our little lives. God and Kevin are helping me to say HALLELUJAH anyway and praise God for all the good in my life, despite all the crap!

First and most precious of our blessings is our little baby due this November.

We have each other, and we're happy in our marriage. That's pretty special.

My Grandma Reesa and Papa Phil immediately made space in their basement and in their lives for us to move into while we figure life out.

We're surrounded by family and friends that love us, support us, and sustain us through good times and bad.

While we're not sure where continued education will take us, we're so privileged to have both completed our bachelor's degrees.

Now, I just need to take a step back and verbally assure you that I know that IT COULD BE SO MUCH WORSE. I recognize that so many of my loved ones and friends out there are battling life monsters that are deeper and more spiritually and emotionally bruising than what I can even imagine. My heart goes out to you, dear ones.

I'm learning about forgiveness. I'm (hopefully) learning something about patience. I'm learning to trust God and struggling to let go of my planned-to-the-T life. As long as we do our best to do what he asks... we'll be ok. We'll be happy. I have faith in that. Sometimes, pieces of my life road ain't hallelujah, but Hallelujah, anyway.

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